In the South (and yes, Oklahoma IS southern), women are bred to do two things: get married and have babies. If you are older than 25 and single, you're an old maid.
I've been told so on several occasions.
Hmmmm. I don't feel old; I'm dang sure not anybody's maid. And quite frankly, there's more to life than rings and bibs. I think we (read: ME) get so obsessed with what everyone else wants that we forget to discover what we want.
I just want to live life with no regrets.
Below, you will find a list of things I'd like to do before I hit the "dirty 30," a bucket list for my twenties. As of today, I have about a year and 3 1/2 months to get on it. Feel free to help if you can; if not, cheer me on from the sidelines.
And if the LOML (love of my life) or Sydney decides to show up during this journey....well....they better get in where they fit in!
30. Find my signature dish.
Church folks know you have to have a signature dish--you're go-to for all potlucks, baby showers and funerals. I've been flying under the radar thus far....but pretty soon, the ladies of UBC are going to figure out that napkins and cups don't really count.
29. Evaluate friendships and really let go of the toxic ones.
28. See the Pistons play in Detroit.
Now, one of y'all got the hookup. Sorry, but it's not like their games are sold-out every night! I just owe it to my team to support them on their home soil.
27. Learn how to drive a stick shift (for real this time).
26. Write a song.
I have a feeling it's going to come out sounding like Toni Braxton power ballad.
25. A visit to the East Coast (gotta see my Philly twin).
24. A visit to the West Coast (Kourtney promised me that In-N-Out burger).
23. Take a dance class
22. Eat a sweet potato (I think they're disgusting, but I'll never really know unless I try).
21. Learn not to feel bad about saying no--even if you're only reason is because you want to go home, put on your PJs and read a book.
20. Read the Bible in its entirety.
I confess:I have my favorite passages. There are certain books and verses I keep going back to because of the way they make me feel. However, I'd like to go through the journey from the beginning and really see how it is all laid out....even the "such and so begat mama 'nem" section.
19. Accept criticism....
I was talking about this with a friend of mine who was surprised this is an issue for me. On the outside, I appear to take it well; but on the inside, I am HOT. I am learning to take criticism for what it is--medicine. Chewing Excedrin tables is gross, but my headache is gone in ten minutes or less.
18. ....not insults.
I have this really bad habit of internalizing insults, especially the passive-aggressive ones. And sometimes, I literally have to look in the mirror and tell myself: "I am NOT that person." And I mean it too. Either get with me or get left...
And I suppose you could get bent too.
17. Pay full price for something.
I came thisclose to dropping some major cash on two skirts I really wanted, but my cheapness just won't let me do it! I might need some Xanax before I attempt this one.
16. Lose control.
I pride myself on being "in control" at all times; but life is a roller coaster. If I know the restraints are on and working, I can fling my arms up in the air, scream at the top of my lungs and enjoy the ride.
15. Stop spending significant time on insignificant people.
Say it with me: the IGNORE feature on cell phones has got to be one of the greatest inventions in the 21st century.
14. Buy myself fresh flowers at least twice a month.
I have a bouquet of daisies sitting on my desk. Every times I look at the vibrant colors and smell their aroma, I smile. I need that simple pleasure in my life.
13. Pay off the rest of my credit card debt.
Kids, listen to me: buying up everything under the sun when you're in college sounds fun....until ten years later, when you're STILL paying for that meal at the Macaroni Grill.
12. Completely let go of one addiction.
Yes, there are many--I have an addictive personality. However, I just believe that if I can conquer one, I can conquer them all.
11. Run in some kind of competitive race.
5K, 10K, half-marathon....any or all of the above. I just need to prove to myself that I am so over the physical limitations of the extra weight I carried around for so many years.
I could also challenge a five-year-old to a race. That counts, right?
10. Learn to play the guitar.
I am the most musical non-musical person I've ever met in my life! I only want to play two songs--"Beautiful Surprise" by India Arie and "Chasing After You" by Tye Tribbett.
9. Change a tire.
I paid attention the last time I got a flat--I think I can do it this time!
8. Be comfortable without the Crackberry (or whatever cell phone).
I think this is different from an addiction--it is an obsession. That thing vibrates more than....well, I won't make that joke.
But it dictates my life--why should that be? It shouldn't. I remember when I used to turn off my cell phone for hours or days at a time, and I need to get back to that. Technology will not rule my life!
Okay, hear me out on this: I don't really want to jump out of plane. I think I just want to do that indoor skydiving....'cause that's a lot closer to the ground!
6. Cultivate an adult wardrobe.
Make no mistake about it--K. Marie knows how to dress. Okay, my STYLIST (and I do have one) knows how to play up my strengths and downplay my weaknesses. To me, an adult wardrobe isn't much different than what I have now, but I do need some signature pieces:
--the power suit
--the "strut" shoes
Refer back to number 17.....whooooo, I'm feeling faint!
I have a real phobia of trying on clothes in general, but ESPECIALLY bras. I just grab what looks right and go. But as a woman--dang near 30 years old--I should probably find out exactly what size I am.
Shayla will love that one.
3. Laugh harder.
IJBH, I was in a really bad mood a few hours ago. I was ready to just read someone the riot act, when someone sent me a YouTube link. It was eighteen seconds long, and I laughed so hard I cried. Just like that, I was calm again.
There are a million other ways to defuse a bad situation, but laughter works every time.
2. Write the freakin' book.
Okay, at this point, I'm even looking into plagiarism.
Seriously, I know there's a book in me. I feel the words, paragraphs and pages in my soul, However, I believe it is a process and I will allow this journey to move at its own pace.
I wonder how many people have read The Bluest Eye....I kid, I kid!
1. Every morning, I will look to the hills and expect the great.
I know how to expect the worst--that's easy. But expecting God to do everything He said He would do? Well, that takes faith.
I have faith.
Therefore, I expect the great.
Be Encouraged, y'all.
And to all of my friends who are turning 30 this year, HA HA!